Well.... I learned a lot this month. One thing I have learned about setting goals (and recently heard somewhere else) is that you should usually make goals that aren't dependent on other people for accomplishment. I think it's easier to gauge why you reach or don't reach a goal when there's only one person contributing toward the goal. Well, most of my goals for 12 in 13 will be solo-accomplished. But this one and my March one (start a garden) include the participation of others, namely Sean and/or Caleb. :) I hope to be able to post on or near the last day of each month and summarize how it went with each goal. So here we go, an end-of-month recap.
January goal: potty-train Caleb.
January result: Caleb is not potty trained. I'm not too bummed, because I know he/we will get there eventually. Now I am wondering if we should wait until after our trip to Hawaii next month (or is it just an excuse, because there never appears to be a convenient time to start.... and we have more travel planned in the future, so he will have to use public potties someday?!). I can only imagine how he would do on a three-hour drive to LA, and a five-hour plane flight with cramped toilet facilities onboard.
I still want to decide on a plan of attack for the "gradual approach" and start it up again in Feb. Will keep you posted!
Thursday, January 31, 2013
Tuesday, January 29, 2013
{12 in 13} January: First update
Well.... the holiday weekend has come and gone, and no potty training occurred... an auspicious beginning to this new goal-setting endeavor. :) Sean and I hadn't had a chance to "compare notes" until after Saturday morning, at which point we mostly-mutually decided to postpone it. And when I say "compare notes," it means "try to explain to Sean what I've been reading and then we decide how we want to do it." But we had a little bit of marital miscommunication, or lack of grace-giving, or I'm not sure what to call it.... just enough to make me want to not push the issue.
I wanted to start the training when we'd have a good chunk of time to work on it (e.g. first thing Saturday morning). I did not think it would be very profitable to start it, say, Sunday after church, where we get home and have maybe an hour of awake time before Caleb's nap. I'm wondering if there might never be a time that seems perfectly convenient to start something like this.
I'm also thinking it might be better for us to try the gradual approach, because of the season we are in: getting to know a newborn. :) Caleb is familiar with his potty chair, and has asked before to sit on the potty with no diaper, but I really don't think he's aware of when he is peeing. One of those times, when I had let him sit on the potty, I helped him stand up, then he peed on the floor, and was like, "Oh! What's that?" He had no idea he had caused that puddle that magically appeared (or so it seemed to me).
So for now, we are still in diapers full time.
The "gradual approach" means (for us) I will start taking him to the toilet a couple times a day (probably after meals so it's easy to remember), sitting him on it for a few minutes so he gets used to it; whether he goes or not is not important. If/when any poop or pee makes it into the toilet, praise the heck out of him. That's as far as I've gotten so far. :)
Any tips, you moms-of-boys-who-are-potty-trained?
I've also been thinking about the rest of my goals... and even spent some time writing out all the action steps I could think of for each month. For example, for my May goal (run the Bull Canyon Run 10k), I put:
For my February goal, I have decided on the baked goodies I will make, as well as quantities of ingredients needed and a shopping list.
For my April goal, I have looked up several Bible reading plans, and dusted off my Daily Light. (I've actually started reading the Daily Light already; is that cheating? ;) My grandmother gave it to me when I graduated from high school, and she's been reading it daily without fail, probably for several decades.)
For my May goal, I have looked up the "couch to 5k" program and will plan on beginning it this coming week (it's a nine-week progression of interval training to get you up to running for 3 miles straight, starting with alternating jogging/walking in one- or two-minute increments). There's also a "5k to 10k" app, but I don't have a smartphone! I'll have to keep hunting and see if the information is on the web site in a different format. The Bull Canyon Run is 16 weeks away from last Saturday (1/26), woohoo! This is one of the few goals that exceeds one month in planning/execution. Most of the rest of them are contained within the month.
Anyway...
I'll plan on placing links to all the monthly posts in one place as they accumulate!
I wanted to start the training when we'd have a good chunk of time to work on it (e.g. first thing Saturday morning). I did not think it would be very profitable to start it, say, Sunday after church, where we get home and have maybe an hour of awake time before Caleb's nap. I'm wondering if there might never be a time that seems perfectly convenient to start something like this.
I'm also thinking it might be better for us to try the gradual approach, because of the season we are in: getting to know a newborn. :) Caleb is familiar with his potty chair, and has asked before to sit on the potty with no diaper, but I really don't think he's aware of when he is peeing. One of those times, when I had let him sit on the potty, I helped him stand up, then he peed on the floor, and was like, "Oh! What's that?" He had no idea he had caused that puddle that magically appeared (or so it seemed to me).
So for now, we are still in diapers full time.
The "gradual approach" means (for us) I will start taking him to the toilet a couple times a day (probably after meals so it's easy to remember), sitting him on it for a few minutes so he gets used to it; whether he goes or not is not important. If/when any poop or pee makes it into the toilet, praise the heck out of him. That's as far as I've gotten so far. :)
Any tips, you moms-of-boys-who-are-potty-trained?
I've also been thinking about the rest of my goals... and even spent some time writing out all the action steps I could think of for each month. For example, for my May goal (run the Bull Canyon Run 10k), I put:
- look up Couch to 5k program
- write out training plan
- start running
- ask Mom to babysit kid(s)?
- join YMCA?
- look up healthy diet for running
- buy sports bra?
- pump up tires on jogging stroller
- register for race online
- update May budget to include registration fee
For my February goal, I have decided on the baked goodies I will make, as well as quantities of ingredients needed and a shopping list.
For my April goal, I have looked up several Bible reading plans, and dusted off my Daily Light. (I've actually started reading the Daily Light already; is that cheating? ;) My grandmother gave it to me when I graduated from high school, and she's been reading it daily without fail, probably for several decades.)
For my May goal, I have looked up the "couch to 5k" program and will plan on beginning it this coming week (it's a nine-week progression of interval training to get you up to running for 3 miles straight, starting with alternating jogging/walking in one- or two-minute increments). There's also a "5k to 10k" app, but I don't have a smartphone! I'll have to keep hunting and see if the information is on the web site in a different format. The Bull Canyon Run is 16 weeks away from last Saturday (1/26), woohoo! This is one of the few goals that exceeds one month in planning/execution. Most of the rest of them are contained within the month.
Anyway...
I'll plan on placing links to all the monthly posts in one place as they accumulate!
Saturday, January 26, 2013
Because He Loves Me
One of the books I received for Christmas and have started reading is Because He Loves Me: How Christ Transforms Our Daily Life by Elyse M. Fitzpatrick.
I've only read the Introduction and the first chapter so far, but already I feel like I need to stop and digest what I've read, or work through a few things in my heart (that's something I love about Elyse Fitzpatrick's books-- so meaty and true).
Her premise is that the gospel should inform our daily life, even after we are saved; the gospel isn't just for getting people saved, but living saved. I agree with that premise wholeheartedly. I've even said things to that effect.
My problem? (Not with the book, but with my thinking.) I have trouble really believing that God loves me. I find it pretty easy to believe He loves "the world" and sent Jesus to die for our sins.... but actually feeling like He loves me? Much harder. For some reason, it's easier to think God loves "the world"-- the sum of humanity, everybody combined-- than to think he loves me, with my faults and sins and not-that-great-ness. I'm just average, not a supermodel or a superstar, not an expert at anything. I still often struggle with wanting to earn my salvation by being perfect, or at least exceptionally efficient, in everything I do. I think I need to prepare the healthiest meal plan, or keep the cleanest house, or raise perfect children, as if doing those things could somehow ingratiate me to God. I think I need to please the people around me by being agreeable and never hurting their feelings, being thoughtful and sweet and utterly untouchable.
The thing is, He made me. He knows me. He does love me. And not because of what I do, as if I could ever be good enough. (Um, I'm pretty sure the standard is perfection.) He loves me because He chooses to. He has given me His grace and saved me, just because He chose to. That's the definition of grace: a voluntary expression of mercy to someone who does nothing to earn it and does not deserve it.
I love it when God ties together truth from different contexts. For exactly two weeks, I have been attending Community Bible Study, a nondenominational organization that has written Bible studies that take place with mostly volunteer staff in various cities around the world. There's a group that meets at a church less than one mile from our house. We're going through the book of Hebrews, and last week's lesson was on "God's promised rest" from chapter four. In the homework we looked at the various "rests" God describes. One type of rest is resting in God's work on our behalf-- His work of saving us. (Note: not our work of saving ourselves!) The lesson tied in John 14 and 15 as well: God's promise of perfect peace; and His call to abide in Him.
That's liberating. It's also very hard for me to really, truly accept, for whatever reason. That's why I feel like I can't keep reading this book until I start to take hold of that truth: God loves ME, Marisa Beth Allen. He knows everything about me, and He loves me. He sees my insecurities, my sins, my heart. And He loves me.
He loves you too. Do you really believe it? Or do you still fall into the trap of trying to be good enough, trying to earn acceptance, trying to work for your salvation? You can rest in the finished work of Jesus. Won't you strive toward that end with me?
Many thanks to Sean, who played trains with Caleb while Chloe slept so I could write this!
I've only read the Introduction and the first chapter so far, but already I feel like I need to stop and digest what I've read, or work through a few things in my heart (that's something I love about Elyse Fitzpatrick's books-- so meaty and true).
Her premise is that the gospel should inform our daily life, even after we are saved; the gospel isn't just for getting people saved, but living saved. I agree with that premise wholeheartedly. I've even said things to that effect.
My problem? (Not with the book, but with my thinking.) I have trouble really believing that God loves me. I find it pretty easy to believe He loves "the world" and sent Jesus to die for our sins.... but actually feeling like He loves me? Much harder. For some reason, it's easier to think God loves "the world"-- the sum of humanity, everybody combined-- than to think he loves me, with my faults and sins and not-that-great-ness. I'm just average, not a supermodel or a superstar, not an expert at anything. I still often struggle with wanting to earn my salvation by being perfect, or at least exceptionally efficient, in everything I do. I think I need to prepare the healthiest meal plan, or keep the cleanest house, or raise perfect children, as if doing those things could somehow ingratiate me to God. I think I need to please the people around me by being agreeable and never hurting their feelings, being thoughtful and sweet and utterly untouchable.
The thing is, He made me. He knows me. He does love me. And not because of what I do, as if I could ever be good enough. (Um, I'm pretty sure the standard is perfection.) He loves me because He chooses to. He has given me His grace and saved me, just because He chose to. That's the definition of grace: a voluntary expression of mercy to someone who does nothing to earn it and does not deserve it.
I love it when God ties together truth from different contexts. For exactly two weeks, I have been attending Community Bible Study, a nondenominational organization that has written Bible studies that take place with mostly volunteer staff in various cities around the world. There's a group that meets at a church less than one mile from our house. We're going through the book of Hebrews, and last week's lesson was on "God's promised rest" from chapter four. In the homework we looked at the various "rests" God describes. One type of rest is resting in God's work on our behalf-- His work of saving us. (Note: not our work of saving ourselves!) The lesson tied in John 14 and 15 as well: God's promise of perfect peace; and His call to abide in Him.
That's liberating. It's also very hard for me to really, truly accept, for whatever reason. That's why I feel like I can't keep reading this book until I start to take hold of that truth: God loves ME, Marisa Beth Allen. He knows everything about me, and He loves me. He sees my insecurities, my sins, my heart. And He loves me.
He loves you too. Do you really believe it? Or do you still fall into the trap of trying to be good enough, trying to earn acceptance, trying to work for your salvation? You can rest in the finished work of Jesus. Won't you strive toward that end with me?
Many thanks to Sean, who played trains with Caleb while Chloe slept so I could write this!
Tuesday, January 22, 2013
One month
This is what happens when you have two kids...
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| Caleb inspecting the goings-on... |
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| The bear is one month old? That can't be right. |
 |
| There, much better. |
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| Had to take off her sleeper so we could see those legs and toes!!! |
I'm quickly realizing that the transition from one to two kids isn't horrible... as long as I don't expect to do anything else except keep the three of us fed, clothed, and changed during the day! :) Still working on fitting in laundry, cleaning, cooking, and errands. It'll come. I did make it to Costco, Trader Joe's, and the post office today, and we all survived! Now I am off to rest while the kids sleep. :)
Friday, January 18, 2013
Chloe's first month, in pictures
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| hanging out at home |
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| we went to the park on New Year's Day, and it was freezing!! nice to get outside, though (she's actually inside my jacket!) |
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| our little snow baby: we call her Boo (from Monster's Inc.) |
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| so tiny! |
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| Memaw & Pawpaw, my grandparents, got to meet her at Christmas |
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| Mommy needs to hold her sometimes too! |
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| Chloe and Uncle Mark, my older bro, getting acquainted |
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| Papa loves holding her :) |
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| my old friend Stu meeting Chloe-- we got to hang out with the Hawkes clan, my "second family," and it was most excellent. There are few people more dear to me on this Earth |
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| family photo |
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| Grammy and her grandgirl! (Love my new LightScoop... thanks for the idea, Mal!) |
Tuesday, January 15, 2013
12 in 13
Ok, folks, here are my 12 goals for 2013.
January
Goal: Potty-train Caleb. My plan is to look up the "boot camp" method (2-3 days of focused concentration on learning the skill, vs. a more gradual approach) and execute it together with Sean during the long weekend of 19th-21st January (the Monday that is MLK, Jr. Day).
February
Goal: Share love. I will focus on sharing non-romantic love by preparing and giving care packages to neighbors or friends. I hope to start Caleb (and our other kids) young on an others-focused, "better to give than receive" mindset... even though I myself am still far from really embracing that, if I'm honest, though I know that's what God and His love are like, and what we are called to emulate. It's just as much training for me as for him, I think! I know it will be fun. I'm thinking we (Caleb and I) will make heart-shaped cookies to give to our neighbors, perhaps with a little Gospel tract or some sort of message to go along with the treats... about the BEST love there is-- God's perfect, undeserved grace expressed in His kindness toward us in Jesus.
March
Goal: Start a garden. Sean wants to learn how to "build stuff," and we are thinking about making some raised beds for our back yard. I'd like to try some strawberries, lettuce, maybe spinach, carrots, beans, berries... there are lots of options. Need to research and decide what exactly we will plant, and whether we will go with seeds or seedlings.
April
Goal: Establish daily prayer/Bible-reading habit. I will set aside a little time to read and pray for 30 days straight during the month of April. I think choosing, and sticking to, one specific time each day will help it happen (i.e. after breakfast or during naptime). I haven't decided where in the Bible to read, or how to pray, or how long I want to shoot for, but I will decide by April. :) I'll admit I'm not very consistent at either of those disciplines right now.
May
Goal: Complete the Bull Canyon Run 10K. This will require starting to run again... soon... as in, starting as soon as I am able to exercise more vigorously. I haven't run in... several months. Maybe about nine. :) Is it cheating to have a goal that is not completely contained in the one month? I will build up two miles per month (Feb, Mar, Apr) till I am able to complete a 10K, or 6.2 miles, in roughly 10 minutes per mile. That's my goal. The last 10K I attempted was last May, when I was 10 weeks pregnant. It was not pretty, but I finished! It didn't help that the first four miles were uphill. But Sean and our friend Cameron were kind enough to run (ok, jog) with me the last few miles and it was a really fun day overall. Hey, this time we will be at sea level! This race is special to me, because the first 5k race I ever did was the Bull Canyon Run in May of 2008.
June
Goal: Fast from refined sugar for one week. I've read a lot about refined sugars, and have read about people who have eliminated it from their diets... but I think the most I could handle would be a week at first. I put white sugar in my coffee. I sprinkle brown sugar on my oatmeal. I bake (and eat) cookies. Sugar is in a LOT of things that I prepare and eat-- even store-bought peanut butter has sugar in it, as an example of places you wouldn't think to look for sugar. Right now, I try my darnedest to avoid high fructose corn syrup, but I do allow other sugars into my home.
July
Goal: Sew, sew, sew! I'd like to work up some inventory for the September goal. :)
August
Goal: Look into homeschooling resources. Caleb is doing great with colors and numbers, which he comes across in some of his books or out in the world. (e.g. Red means stop!). I'd like to look for something a little bit structured, even just to give me some ideas for how to occupy him when I am nursing or trying to do something that requires both hands and concentration.
September
Goal: Open Etsy shop. I have a lot of research and fine-tuning to do before this point! There are a lot of great tutorials on the Etsy site and elsewhere.
October
Goal: Memorize one chapter of Scripture. Chapter TBD. :)
November
Goal: Prepare for the Advent season. This will include buying new Advent candles (ours melted sometime during the past year); researching kid activities/devotionals; purchasing any other supplies for crafts or nativity-set creating; and brainstorming gift giving ideas for our family members and our giving budget with Sean.
December
Goal: Make and execute a "giving list"... not a "wish list." Our parents ask for our lists each year, which is great because we will love what they give us! They want to bless us, and I appreciate that. I am really enjoying the CD, Boppy cover, spatulas, cooling racks, etc. I asked for. :) I'm also enjoying the things I didn't ask for. Some good reading-- I hope to share more about that later. What I don't like is that I start thinking a lot about what I want, even though I have more than I need. My desire this year is to focus on giving and not ask for anything, except maybe two chickens and a goat or education for girls.
There you have it! Twelve goals, some spiritual, some physical, all doable with God's help! I'm excited. Do you have any ideas for your own 2013? I'd love to hear about it!
January
Goal: Potty-train Caleb. My plan is to look up the "boot camp" method (2-3 days of focused concentration on learning the skill, vs. a more gradual approach) and execute it together with Sean during the long weekend of 19th-21st January (the Monday that is MLK, Jr. Day).
February
Goal: Share love. I will focus on sharing non-romantic love by preparing and giving care packages to neighbors or friends. I hope to start Caleb (and our other kids) young on an others-focused, "better to give than receive" mindset... even though I myself am still far from really embracing that, if I'm honest, though I know that's what God and His love are like, and what we are called to emulate. It's just as much training for me as for him, I think! I know it will be fun. I'm thinking we (Caleb and I) will make heart-shaped cookies to give to our neighbors, perhaps with a little Gospel tract or some sort of message to go along with the treats... about the BEST love there is-- God's perfect, undeserved grace expressed in His kindness toward us in Jesus.
March
Goal: Start a garden. Sean wants to learn how to "build stuff," and we are thinking about making some raised beds for our back yard. I'd like to try some strawberries, lettuce, maybe spinach, carrots, beans, berries... there are lots of options. Need to research and decide what exactly we will plant, and whether we will go with seeds or seedlings.
April
Goal: Establish daily prayer/Bible-reading habit. I will set aside a little time to read and pray for 30 days straight during the month of April. I think choosing, and sticking to, one specific time each day will help it happen (i.e. after breakfast or during naptime). I haven't decided where in the Bible to read, or how to pray, or how long I want to shoot for, but I will decide by April. :) I'll admit I'm not very consistent at either of those disciplines right now.
May
Goal: Complete the Bull Canyon Run 10K. This will require starting to run again... soon... as in, starting as soon as I am able to exercise more vigorously. I haven't run in... several months. Maybe about nine. :) Is it cheating to have a goal that is not completely contained in the one month? I will build up two miles per month (Feb, Mar, Apr) till I am able to complete a 10K, or 6.2 miles, in roughly 10 minutes per mile. That's my goal. The last 10K I attempted was last May, when I was 10 weeks pregnant. It was not pretty, but I finished! It didn't help that the first four miles were uphill. But Sean and our friend Cameron were kind enough to run (ok, jog) with me the last few miles and it was a really fun day overall. Hey, this time we will be at sea level! This race is special to me, because the first 5k race I ever did was the Bull Canyon Run in May of 2008.
June
Goal: Fast from refined sugar for one week. I've read a lot about refined sugars, and have read about people who have eliminated it from their diets... but I think the most I could handle would be a week at first. I put white sugar in my coffee. I sprinkle brown sugar on my oatmeal. I bake (and eat) cookies. Sugar is in a LOT of things that I prepare and eat-- even store-bought peanut butter has sugar in it, as an example of places you wouldn't think to look for sugar. Right now, I try my darnedest to avoid high fructose corn syrup, but I do allow other sugars into my home.
July
Goal: Sew, sew, sew! I'd like to work up some inventory for the September goal. :)
August
Goal: Look into homeschooling resources. Caleb is doing great with colors and numbers, which he comes across in some of his books or out in the world. (e.g. Red means stop!). I'd like to look for something a little bit structured, even just to give me some ideas for how to occupy him when I am nursing or trying to do something that requires both hands and concentration.
September
Goal: Open Etsy shop. I have a lot of research and fine-tuning to do before this point! There are a lot of great tutorials on the Etsy site and elsewhere.
October
Goal: Memorize one chapter of Scripture. Chapter TBD. :)
November
Goal: Prepare for the Advent season. This will include buying new Advent candles (ours melted sometime during the past year); researching kid activities/devotionals; purchasing any other supplies for crafts or nativity-set creating; and brainstorming gift giving ideas for our family members and our giving budget with Sean.
December
Goal: Make and execute a "giving list"... not a "wish list." Our parents ask for our lists each year, which is great because we will love what they give us! They want to bless us, and I appreciate that. I am really enjoying the CD, Boppy cover, spatulas, cooling racks, etc. I asked for. :) I'm also enjoying the things I didn't ask for. Some good reading-- I hope to share more about that later. What I don't like is that I start thinking a lot about what I want, even though I have more than I need. My desire this year is to focus on giving and not ask for anything, except maybe two chickens and a goat or education for girls.
There you have it! Twelve goals, some spiritual, some physical, all doable with God's help! I'm excited. Do you have any ideas for your own 2013? I'd love to hear about it!
Monday, January 7, 2013
It's a new year!!
Anyway, I have decided, in lieu of a list of New Year's resolutions, I am going to focus on one task, project, or idea for each month of this year (still finalizing the contents of this endeavor). That way, hopefully, I won't feel overwhelmed with trying to get better in every area of life at once (e.g. "I'm going to memorize a chapter of Scripture, and start a garden, and potty-train Caleb, and run a 10K, and open an Etsy shop... today!"). I'm excited. I've never really looked at a whole year like that, plugging in goals on a calendar. I'm good at making lists, and having great ideas, but lists or goals (or lists of goals) can easily become overwhelming when all the items on the list are fair game at once. I tend to give up or avoid looking at the list if I don't know where to start. So, 12 items for 2013. Should be doable! I'll be logging my progress here, so stay tuned...
More soon!
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